Muhammad's Tips on Writing Your Suicide Note
Your suicide note will be the last thing people have to remember you.Your relatives, friends, police officers, and others, will read it. In some cases, suicide notes, or parts of them, even get to the media. One might think that a Muslim suicide note would be a more carefully crafted personal document, however in many cases, they are written carelessly and hastily.
Muhammad's tips are for people who want to leave a real impression.
Item: if you are not actually committing suicide because you want to die but are just looking to get attention, do not bother reading this. Your note will mean nothing once the doctors are done treating the scratches on your wrists or pumping the 2000mg of Advil out of your stomach. There are better ways of getting attention, try one of the services for people who are crying for help.
Tip #1Start Early.
Getting an early start is important. If you can, start a few days before your suicide. Make sure you're in a clear state of mind. You do not want to try to write your note while waiting for the explosives you strapped on to kick in, or have to rush through it before you bleed to death. Giving yourself enough time to write your note will help eliminate the most common mistakes.
Tip #2
Don't try to say everything.
There are probably a lot of things you have on your mind, and you need
to take some time and sort them out. Decide what is most important to
say and leave out things that don't matter. Decide now what you want
your readers to come away with after reading your note. Eliminate those
things that distract from that point.
Tip #3
Handwrite your note if you can.
A handwritten note is a lot more personal. However, if you are worried
your letter will not be understood, or you are physically not able to
write it by hand don't worry about it. The important thing is that you
get your message across.
Tip #4
Be natural.
Write the way you would speak. A good suicide note is personal, not
formal. Don't get out the thesaurus and look for the biggest words you
can find. Be yourself.
Tip #5
Avoid cliché's.
Filling your note with phrases like "Allah Arkba" will make your note feel less like your thoughts and
more like a form letter. Too many cliché's and it can look like you are
just going through the motions or that you are leaving a note because
you feel that you should, but without having anything to say. If you
want to say something but it sounds too cliché, try to re-word it a
little.
Tip #6
In general, use first person.
It creates a sense of intimacy and makes it easier for a reader to see
things from your point of view, if you want to use a different point of
view, be sure that you stick to it throughout your whole note.
Tip #7
Don't use your note like a will.
You might want your best friend to get your Qur'an but your suicide note
is not the place to express that. If you want to leave certain things to
certain people you should setup a will ahead of time. Just because you
write it down does not make it legal, and it can be easily dismissed by
the claim that you were not of sound mind when you wrote it.
Take the time to set up a Will, a Will helps keep you from giving away your stuff in the months/weeks/days before the suicide. That's one of the most obvious indications that you are thinking about killing yourself and can likely get you "saved", or at least make the process easier.
Tip #8
Be Honest.
Your note is one of the last things you give the world to judge you
by. If you include things that others can disprove, it can discount the
entire note. Besides, there is not much reason for lying at this point,
is there?
Tip #9
Don't reveal your methods.
This is most important when you are allowing Allah (translation ~
Lucifer) to use your sick dumb ignorant
mind. Telling everyone what you are about to do just makes it easier for
the infidels to
give you the caring common since treatment needed to save you. Alternately, you do not want someone to find the
note that details which innocent targets you're blowing up before you get that
chance. Once again the infidel might be able to stop you. People will find out once the autopsy reports come in anyway.
Tip #10
Don't say anything you might regret.
There is always a chance that you will be found and "rescued". Suicide
notes are not the place to rip into people, give away other's secrets,
or confess crimes. The last thing you want is to end up in a hospital
bed, facing the people who read something you would never have told them
while alive.
Tip #11
Don't try to persuade the reader.
You do not want to spend your time trying to convince the reader that
you are right. In most cases nothing you can say will change the way
they feel. Your purpose is to express your point of view. It doesn't
matter if the reader shares your point of view or not, only that they
understand it.
Tip #12
Proofread your note.
Re-read your note at least twice. It's easy to make a simple mistake
that distracts from the overall feel of the note. When reading over your
note, there are a lot of things to look for. It's better to read it
several times, looking for something different each time then to try to
remember it all while reading it over once.
Make sure the point you wanted to get across when you started writing is
clear. Don't be afraid to make edits, but be sure to read your note over
again when you do.
Tip #13
Make your note easy to find.
Take some time to consider where to leave your note. If you can't leave
it near you, be sure to leave it in an obvious location. Even if you
want someone in particular to read your note first, avoid sending it to
someone by mail. There are too many things that could go wrong and once
you send it, it's gone. Your note could get lost in the mail, or worse,
it could reach someone before you can go though with it.
Tip #14
Check your note for flow.
Your note should progress rather then being a loose connection of
thoughts and feelings. People reading your note should see that it is
going somewhere. If you're having a hard time, start with a sentence or
two that sums up the point of the letter, and then end with a summary of
the same topic. Every paragraph in between should support that point.
Tip #15
Make sure it's not too long.
There is a reason it's called a suicide note and not a novel. Try to
keep it around two or three pages at the most. Avoid the temptation to
mention or leave a little note to everyone you know. Not only does that
get dull fast but you're certain to leave someone out.
Now that the secret is out an increase in martyr arrivals from all walks
of life is anticipated. Hurry up and invite your cult leaders to go with you while
supplies last.
